I just lost my cat, Upin, just 2 days before Raya day. Losing him, made me realize, once again, that I should never take something or someone for granted. I know that every living things will die someday. I know that the seems-like-limitless-time I have will eventually come to an end. I know that this beautiful life I have will sooner or later find its end. But I still take them for granted.
So, Upin died on Tuesday, 13th June 2018. He had lost his appetite since two days before, I tried ways to made him eat. Usually, when he had no appetite I would give him the food my self, made him smell it first. But strangely, it didn't work that day. On Monday I decided to take him to the vet. I went to the vet with my brother. The vet said that Upin had crystal on his kidney. I was sad. Extremely. Because I once had a cat before, named Bobi. Bobi died 3 years prior on 2015, November 29th to be exact, because of the same diagnosis. Bobi died because he had crystal on his kidney and he was also infected by a virus. So I felt like it was my fault. Then, the vet prescribed some medicines for him. I took the medicine, paid the bill, and took him home. I, my brother, and my dad all gave him the medicine. He took it with our help. He still didn't want to eat. But he drank the prepared water.
Tuesday morning, even thou Upin was sick, he still could climb a wall in front of my house that is quite tall. Back and forth on top of that. I thought he was getting better because of the medicine. In the afternoon that day, he got into the house and slept in our living room. In the evening, around 5 pm he moved to our kitchen and slept near our bathroom. My brother notice that he could not move his body anymore. He was really weak. After having iftar, we--I, my bro, my mom, and my dad-- all gathered around him--crying. My mom hold him close, saying things like "If you want to go, then go. We are all will be alright" yes we believed that he understand what we said. My mom claimed that Upin cried. We all cried. We took him to our living room. He was really weak. He was in the brink of death. My mom told me to give him water. I put water to the syringe and put it in his mouth slowly. He drank it. Right after he drank, he made a weak meow, twice, and he is gone at around half past 7. It was really fast. Everything happened really fast. The vet prescribed the medicine for 5 day, but he only took it twice and died. We buried him in front of our house that night.
Losing him make me regret many things. I keep on thinking why dont I play with him much, why dont I pat him much, why dont I spend my time with him much, and many more. I once read a quote that went by enough is never a word in front of death. Still, now that he is gone I regret it so much.
Actually it happened before also. It happened to me several times--regretting not doing enough. It was when my grandma passed away 2 years ago. I knew, I was fully aware that my grandma was old, she was sick, I was aware that someday I would face days where she doesnt exist physically anymore. I love her so much, I share special bond with her as she was the one that took care of me since I was little. One day she was weak so much she couldnt get up from the bed. The family decided to took her to the hospital. She laid in the hospital room for almost a week until she breathed her last breath. She passed away in the hospital around 4 pm, 2 hours before I decided to went home as I had been staying almost awake in the hospital watching over her with my cousin, my aunt, and my uncle. The things I regret the most is I didnt hug her enough. I didnt tell her I love you enough. I didnt accompany her enough. I didnt really listen to her words. But there is nothing I could do now.
Disclaimer: I don't own the pics. Credit to the owners.
